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The recent issue I am witnessing being - Sexism and Twitter is public (like it or not).
Public with a touch of Sexism
Twitter like it or not isn't having a discreet conversation with some one unless you send messages. If you tweet, you are open to having responses. I recently made one which the individual obviously didn't like. The original tweet was particularly aimed at men, most likely a guy who had been controlling. If you are stupid enough to get with a guy like that, sorry to say but you have little sympathy. I've had friends who didn't listen to advice and as a result either had abortions or became single mothers while spending a long time slating men. So I say this again - No Sympathy.
So apparently the above part was worded in such a way people didn't quite understand the actual point being made. It's okay - some people struggle to read between the lines and see the actual message. Instead they see what they want and throw their toys out of their prams because I am being - honest and saying how it is.
Life is about learning from mistakes, we all do it. We some times fall over when walking down the street which is why learn to watch where we walk and to pay attention. The above paragraph is about those who continue to make mistakes and refuse to listen. The "no sympathy" might be harsh but frankly life is not a sugar coated biscuit that a lot of youth these days think. Life WILL bite you sooner or later. This happens even to rich celebrities who have drug problems, meltdowns or dwindling careers.
Life is not pretty. If people fail to see the obvious mistakes sorry NO SYMPATHY. I had a friend who failed to listen to her friends and family regarding "the jerk", we advised her to take precautions if she refused to walk away. In the end she got dumped when she fell pregnant, the result was she went through an abortion which devastated her. As a friend I did the right thing and stood by her when no one else did. She became a much more evil and bitter twisted person as time went by. In the end she treated people on how this jerk treated her (even though he was still able to worm his way back in to her life because she wouldn't stop). Even one of her nicest friends used the term "no sympathy".
There's a lot of terms - You made your bed, you go sleep in it. Dig your own grave, shot in the foot. Terms used in regards to the EU - those voted remain are constantly using terms like this. Especially when peoples lively hoods are being destroyed, people losing jobs, marriage issues or even contemplating suicide.
If you physically or mentally can't handle life, sorry to say - NO SYMPATHY. You can cry about this, whine about it but life is not a soft bed. "Get Over it". It's strange the very people who complain about the liars in our Government also complain when people say what's needed to be said.
If you refuse to help your self, don't complain when no one wants to assist.
I push this on to my self as well, I've made many mistakes and even as a kid a long time ago.. I was a little swine.. a troublemaker. I have no sympathy for my self and certainly DO NOT expect any either. I've made a ton of love life mistakes with exs, fallen out with friends and even gone through some serious harsh life problems and serious injuries. - I got over them and I don't expect sympathy. They have made me stronger, I don't sit here in self pity.
So examples:
- Woman has a miscarriage but was a heavy smoker, drinker takes drugs. Never eats well or healthy, treats life like a joke and throws daily abuse at people - Would you have sympathy for her?
- Politician is caught avoiding tax, backstabs his own party leader, cheats on his wife while also being abusive towards her but has money trouble as a result from being sacked and faces prison - Would you have sympathy for him?
Funny how two examples of people who may very well be innocent and perhaps have made some big mistakes in their life, would anyone give them sympathy? Now you will see the point I have been making.
Remember - There are those who don't have choices in their harsh lives, those who fight for food and drink every day. Who have serious illnesses that they couldn't prevent. THESE are the people who deserve sympathy when they have so little when the rest of us have so much and expect even more. These people are not making mistakes, these people when given the same opportunities tend to make a better life than the rest of us.
So let's continue the real subject I wanted to touch upon:
As a guy, I openly defend people because not everyone is "the same". If I see a comment that's aimed at women from a man I will say the exact same thing. This time around I mentioned the fact that women are no different - after all they are equal. Now if you don't want to discuss a tweet further, the best thing to do is not respond. What's the point if you don't want to discuss the subject? So here comes the responses and they came across as "hostile" as if some one has a problem with men. My reaction as I said before would have been the same as if it was a guy complaining about women. I questioned it - Well it's twitter after all - freedom of speech? it's open to discussion on a social network otherwise if it's a private matter why would you discuss it openly on twitter.
Then came the "Boy" comment. I've been following this individual on twitter and twitch, she's had some personal life issues and insecurities. I've been able to predict this background anger of hostility. After all, some one who is in a happy relationship and not single craving love/attention wouldn't react this way. This comment came across as quite sexist. As a guy, I can criticise my fellow men - after all I am one and fully understand that we are as much guilty as we are innocent - same as women. Unfortunately this individual is used to the attention from men, especially geeks who perhaps have rarely had a woman in their life. Having a large experience in women and relationships, I was able to tell exactly what this woman was like and wasn't surprised at the reaction.
A woman who doesn't have any anger issues would have accepted my response and wouldn't need to reply because it's a private matter? Luckily enough my life has taught me to avoid these kind of women because they at times can be quite needy. I've known men like this, controlling and insecure. They react badly when their other half contacts a guy. It's why some women use the term "he's gay" just so it doesn't cause any issues. Having been the innocent and guilty one on this front - I certainly can sense it. Guys who control their women just like women controlling their men is a very unattractive trait. It destroys relationships and crushes spirits. It can even change some ones personality (a lot of this has become punishable domestic abuse in the UK and rightly so).
So this individual who shall we say is used to having all sorts of people follow her for simple things. Like cooking, random chats, random thoughts and random games. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to work out the slight spoilt attitude. Slightly attractive as well and not necessarily a bad body, again as I mentioned is used to having men jump to talk to her.
Course she openly defended this other person with no regards of what was being said. I was being criticised because I actually stood up for "equality" and that not all men are guilty plus some women like it or not are no different. Then came "ordering me" if I say "calm down" - that is by no definition an order. It's a suggestion, a request, something that a British person would say to a passer by. If on the other hand I said "Simon says" that by all means is an order. If I say "Shut up" that is an aggressive suggestion bordering on an order. Calm down is a simple polite way that you being relaxed might help.
I'm a big fan of twitter, it allows you to discuss with anyone about anything all publicly. It's actually why I use a secret account because I openly criticise my own professionals and the type of people I worked with over the (nearly) 20 years.
I've had my fair share of bad women and certainly not had a small love life either. I've had plenty of friends through the years and every single one of them has had relationships in some way. This helped create my large experience and because I am able to spend five minutes with some one and predict what they are like (the other half didn't believe me at first till I constantly proved it).
If you have issues you need to deal with them first, you need to be happy before you find some one.
So the Feminists again
A hot topic on and off twitter every couple of days. Some feminists are pushing on the border (even breaking it) on the superiority attitude against men. Feminism is not about superiority it's about equality nothing less and nothing more - that's a fact. You should not be dishing something you can't take.
Grow a back bone - as a kid I grew up in a rough area, my friends have been there and done that while still throw banter. This all helped me grow that back bone.
So why is it, if I openly question or even explain the situation that's classes as a "hissy fit". As I type up this blog I do so calmly, explaining, showing some examples of the good, the bad and the ugly.
Is that a term you would use sitting in a group of tables openly discussing something? And because you don't necessarily agree with something that's classed as a hissy fit? I sometimes wonder if people are too used to not having questions put towards them. Why did you get up in the morning? Why did you choose your career? What do you do at the weekends? What do you do during the weekdays?
If I continue to question something that's simply curiosity not a "hissy fit". If I publicly advertise questions how is that no different to aiming it to one person?
As I said before I think the issue here is some have had their lives handed to them and perhaps had little friction to deal with. In my job I have to question, if I don't understand something I want more information, if I don't agree I will say it. If that means I make a phone call, have a chat or simply put it on an email then it's no different to any other discussion. I'm making points - which is what my blogs are about.
Solution
In one simple line - get over your self. British term used often, it's not meant to be a passive gesture but instead it means - realise the world doesn't evolve around you. Life isn't easy and it can be hard but working towards the future and don't use aggression to dictate how you live. I will say what a relative WW2 vet said many years ago. We fought, we died and we came home broken. We had to do it, some didn't want to, some did, some were afraid and some were courageous. Creating a better world and protecting one from evil. I hope you live the life we will be proud of.
It was a line I learnt off by heart (mainly because he would remind me every month)...
Problem is with some people especially in todays world, so many have been used to having life handed to them on a silver plate. It's rare to see people working all day every day just to put food on the table. My family know that's why I work very hard. I get paid 37 hours a week yet I tend to do 45. It secures my position, it doesn't grant a pay rise or better prospects but instead it tightens my grip on a safe job.
How many work hard for everything they have?
Our nation, our world is fast becoming - sorry to say this - a whore.
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